Saturday, February 13, 2010

Last Time I Checked...

Rahul Mahajan. Honestly, all that comes into mind when I think of this guy is the fact that some years ago, he was caught for snorting cocaine through rolled up 500 Rupee notes. I'm sure he would've used the 1000 Rupee ones except for I don't think they were available back then.

The bloke apparently married some girl called Shweta who later filed for divorce because he was beating her black and blue and after knowing him for 13 years and agreeing to marry him, they suddenly became 'incompatible'. Is is just me or is all of this really suspicious sounding?

Alright, alright! Whatever Rahul Mahajan does is his prerogative. After all, he is an aspiring politician and needs his fair share of publicity and scandals. Otherwise, I would've barely known who he was. But what's with this Swayamvar?

Sixteen, yes SIXTEEN, girls have thrown themselves onto this wife beating, drug snorting psychopath for a chance to marry him [for his money] and live a happy life [of black-wealth, pseudo-fame and abuse]. As usual, my roommate is glued on to the TV watching intently as these girls profess their love for a man they don't even know, writing him poems and being vulnerable and all that schabazz. I want to strangle her, but cannot [for legal reasons alone].

So while Indian television sinks to new lows, American celebrities are getting younger and younger. I have no problems with young celebrities. I think it's awesome [as long as they don't succumb to all the pressure and end up becoming drug addicted, face lifting wierdos]. But what's with 15 year olds singing 22 year old stuff. Take Justin Bieber, for instance. It's awesome that he's a very talented singer, self taught guitarist, pianist, drummer yadda yadda... but seriously. Here's a 15 year old singing about commitment, packing bags, bad ex-relationships and such like. How many [live in] girlfriends could he have possibly had, and why, pray tell, is he running after an obviously much older girl by keeping a piece of her clothing hostage? Here's the video. The comments are full of older women feeling like pedophiles for finding him hot. I'm 4 years older than him and I want to pet him. That's how little-boyish he seems.

I also watched a tiny little girl named Raveena dance with a bunch of women who seemed to be performing in some kind of S&M bondage video on VH1. I was scared. Honestly, why would you do that to a little girl who still has puppy fat and is in serious need for braces. She has milk teeth, for crying out loud! I can't find the video but if any of you know what I'm talking about please let me know. She's an American of Indian Origin, I presume. When you see it, you'll realise immediately. It's hard to miss. Oh wait, less work for you! Here's the video.

So while I'm losing my faith in good entertainment, the world is turning pink. That's right! It's that time of the year again when everything turns flowery, hearty, expensive and cheesy. Valentine's Day is here and I'm going to cut off my own finger slowly and painfully with a butter knife. That seems like a more productive thing to do with my time than indulge in this hallmark-induced psycho-fest. I'll let you know how that goes.


  1. Oh wow!!! reflecting my thoughts entirely :)

  2. "my eyes.. MY EYES"

    you , sir, have traumatised my adolescent mind by exposing me to the horror that is raveena's video.

    Shame on you.

    Ignorance definitely is bliss.

  3. @ mum: what has the world come to? nooooo!
    @ weirdo: you can't have your eyes closed to such atrocities... it's WRONG, WRONG i tell you

  4. Are you serious? Rahul Mahajan held a swayamvar?
    also, aren't girls supposed to garland a boy?! neo-swayamvar, I guess!